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KLoC: Chapter Fourteen

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Chapter Fourteen: I Meant to do That

     

    “You have to hide.” Cedric whispered.

    “Hm. Copy that,” I agreed, “fallout and regroup kitties!”

    I bounded up the stairs followed by the other three. The knocking continued and Cedric soon disappeared to check it out. Spork was to my current left. Kerfuffle to my right. Its position allowed for a better view of Cedric so I called to it.

    “Kerfuffle, what can you see?”

    “Target Human has approached the door and opened it. Longer haired Human and short haired Human at the other side.”

    “Can we take them?”

    A slight pause. “Probably. Visitors appear…surprised by scent of the house. They are moving further inside.”

    “Hold steady kitties.” I ordered quietly, not that anyone was moving.

    I flattened myself low and kept watch.

    “Oh yeah,” I heard Cedric chuckle, “I was just cooking some food for my cat.”

    “I’d hate to be the cat.” Another voice called.

    Chuckling.

    It appeared the Humans had brought some paperwork over. Suspicious. And beyond that it meant they probably intended to be here for awhile. That would prove boring for us having to wait here. I observed the set of Humans. They didn’t seem very conscious of their surroundings and rather chose to talk about the work they had brought over.

    Cedric had pulled over a couple of chairs and they sat around a low table, debating stuff that didn’t make any sense to me. Whatever it was it seemed to have Kerfuffle’s attention. It would strain to listen to the words, occasionally nodding or shaking its head. Computer talk no doubt. That was something Cedric and Kerfuffle had in common.

    “I don’t think the Humans are a threat.” I pointed out quietly.

    “I agree.” Spork grumbled. “But we shouldn’t stay here.”

    “We could sneak out and wait for them to leave.”

    “Let’s do that.”

    I nodded, knowing command had been given back to me. Spork wasn’t familiar with the upstairs portion of the house because it spent all day in the garage. I actually wasn’t too sure where I was leading us either, but I knew there were windows and we could probably sneak out of one of those.

    “Where are we going?” Kerfuffle asked.

    I didn’t reply until we were in one of the rooms. The Humans still hadn’t noticed and fortunately we hadn’t run into any squeaky floor boards.

    Seemed I had taken us into the upstairs bathroom. Okay so it probably hadn’t been the most ideal place…I suppressed a yowl as Kerfuffle stepped on my tail, having been bumped forward by Spork. It was a tight fit to say the least. Hearts was sitting on the sink and Kerfuffle was standing awkwardly between me and Spork.

    “So how do we get out of here?” Someone asked.

    I looked to the window. That was really our only option unless we wanted to stand around in the bathroom the whole time.

    A startled squeak from behind almost made me jump out of my fur. It was cut off abruptly. I turned to see what had happened—and stumbled against the wall after trotting over part of Kerfuffle’s tail. Spork had its paw over Kerfuffle’s mouth. It removed it after a moment and look at the Qwuedeviv with much disapproval.

    “What’s your problem?” It growled lowly.

     “My tail.” Kerfuffle pouted, holding it up as best it could. The tip was drenched, water pouring down it into toilet bowl.

    Hm, yes that seemed like a legitimate reason for displeasure. Spork sighed and rolled its eyes.

    “Right.” I meowed. “We can climb out the window here and we’ll be safe from the Humans.”

    “Climb?” Hearts mewed uncertainly. “I haven’t done much climbing of buildings in my training.”

    “I’ll carry you.” Spork replied with a flick of his tail. “You too, Commander.” Before I could protest it added, “You have no claws.”

    Once on the ground Kerfuffle gave its tail another flick, gazing unhappily at the water drenched appendage. “I’m not licking that off. It’s so gross.”

    Spork got a chuckle out of that. “Tropical pansy.”

    “What?” Kerfuffle looked indignant. “You’re not telling me if it had happened to you you’d have licked it off, are you?”

    “No.” Spork’s tail swished about. “I wouldn’t trust it unless it was medic approved as nontoxic.”

    “Pokeyoo would tell you to drink out of that bowl thing.” I murmured.

    “Then I’d claw its ears off.”

    I didn’t doubt that.

    “We should probably move.”

    Spork nodded agreement—one of the rare times it thought I had a good idea—and the whole bundle of us began moving along single file. I was in the lead. I stalked around the backyard and realized none of this was going to be an ideal exit. At that point, Spork grumbled something and passed me up, taking position as leader and doubling back towards the front yard. It cast a glance at the house, trying to peer into windows to make sure no one was looking out of them at that moment.

    “So now what?” Kerfuffle asked, huffing and flopping down near a low growing bush of some sort. 

    It wasn’t used to this sort of work. It only worked with computers all day long.

    It  was a question worth asking though. We hadn’t even gotten to enjoy our cat food buffet before getting kicked out. Now our burnt dinner was going to be cold when we got back in.

    “We can’t search for the others right now.” Spork pointed out.

    I wasn’t sure why this was a bad time to look for them, but I didn’t want to anyway so I didn’t argue it.

    “Then let’s spy on the Humans!”

    The others didn’t look interested at first—especially not Kerfuffle.

    “Why would we do that?”

    “Maybe they have inside information!” I mused.

    Spork snorted. “I highly doubt a group of Humans would have anything to speak of worth listening to.”

    There was a bit of silence again. Hearts was batting at a blade of grass; Kerfuffle was staring absently forward in a daze with occasional whimpers and glances to its wet tail.

    “Well….does anyone else have any better suggestions?”

    “Not really.” Spork admitted.

    “So…watching the Humans…?”

    “We could classify it as training I suppose.” Spork shrugged as it got up, Hearts stifled a squeal and followed its example. Kerfuffle looked less than enthusiastic though.

    “Can’t I just hide in some shrubs? I don’t want to stalk the Humans. I work on computers, stealth isn’t my—”

    “Training.” Spork cut it off with a sharp glare.

    Kerfuffle whimpered but complied. We gathered around, pressed against the house beneath the windows. It was still light outside so that meant this would be all the more challenging, but it was easy to pinpoint where the noisy creatures were at least. They bellowed with laughter and loud remarks. 

    Being small came in handy in this situation. Me and Hearts could easily and comfortably sit below windows, unseen by any prying eyes.

    “Kerfuffle, you guard the coast.”

    Kerfuffle stood up straight and brought a paw level with its forehead to shade its eyes from the setting sun. “What coast? I don’t see any coast.”

    Spork reached out and pushed its head down with an irritated hiss.

    “What?” Kerfuffle asked.

    “The window, furbrain, that’s what.”

    “Oh. Right.” It leaned over to me, “Smiley, I don’t see any coast.”

    “I just meant out thereish.” I pointed at the yard and that which was beyond it. “Make sure no one sneaks up on us.”

    I turned my attention back to the window. Spork was leaned against the house beside it and Hearts was…batting at some tiny bug in the grass it seemed.

    “I hope the Qahrburboxis is hidden well.”

    “They’re professionals at everything they do.” Spork tossed out. “I’m sure it’ll do fine.”

    I tended to agree.

    The Humans were surprisingly easy to stalk; they clearly had no formal training in keeping a close watch at all times. We could even stare through the window at them with no risk of them glancing over. They didn’t seem to be looking anywhere other than the stack of papers they had brought. I couldn’t think of a single paper I had ever seen that would hold my attention for that long.

    We had come to the conclusion that they were likely coworkers of Cedric’s. They certainly weren’t military personnel or anyone we needed to be concerned about. After awhile they became so little of a concern that we stopped watching them all together.

    Then we were just sitting together, doing absolutely nothing other than waiting. There really wasn’t much to do in Cedric’s yard when you couldn’t be loud for risk of alerting a pack of Humans and although no one said anything they all looked restless in their own ways.

    Hearts was looking all around, as if to find something more interesting, Kerfuffle was staring at its knees where it was huddled up—an unmoving statue. Spork said nothing and didn’t look particularly upset, but it was tense, I could vaguely detect that and me, I was having the hardest time staying still and in the same place. To top it off I wasn’t even tired so taking a nap wasn’t going to happen.

    “How long can Humans talk about pieces of paper?” I grumbled.

    No one answered. None of them knew anyway. The Humans didn’t appear to be any part of a secret spying agency or other Human government system though. That was good news for Cedric, for had he welcomed in such foes, we’d have probably had to kill him. That was something I simply wouldn’t have been able to protect him from.

    A light shower of rain began to drift from the sky, resting gently on my outer fur layer and uniform. I hissed quietly, even this calm sky-water was not appreciated.

    “Lieutenant,” Kerfuffle spoke up, “I want to go home. The coast is boring. No one is going to be crossing it. It looks deserted.”

    Cedric was a ways out of the routine path, the chance of other Humans appearing was slim, but who had expected this set? I wasn’t going to bring up the fact Kerfuffle hadn’t even been watching the coast, but Spork had jumped on the comment and was doing a better job of whisper-ripping at it than I probably ever could have done.

    Finally, the Humans got up. We kept our ears down low as we watched. They laughed then shook hands, exchanged paperwork, stood around discussing something that sounded like the sock market and finally headed back towards the door. Of course that meant our position needed to alter so as to avoid them coming across us all curled up in the front yard.

    I led the way around the back again, the others all following in line behind me. Spork stepped on my tail once and Kerfuffle nearly tripped over its own foot, but we made it there, all onto the back deck, which was at least covered from the light drizzle of rain. We listened collectively.

    Subtle sounds drifted from the front yard. The open of the front door, some polite laughter then a collective patter of footsteps along the path. They grew fainter until we could hear the car door open then close. The car started. No one moved until that sound had faded to a dull hum.

    “Exciting.” Hearts mewed, swishing its stubby tail back and forth.

    Kittens. I rolled my eyes and got to my feet.

    “Well troops, I have declared that we are safe to proceed to the house.” It was probably an unnecessary statement, but it made me feel better about my status and position.

    No one protested.  I could hear Cedric walking about the house, calling for us. He hadn’t seemed to have figured out that we had gone outside.

    “One moment.” I flicked my tail tip to the left, “I need to activate the tracking beacons so that we may be restored to our rightful base faster.” Spork looked skeptical, but I ignored it. It would thank me later. “Ceeeedric.” I meowed loudly and batted at the door.

    Spork growled and muttered something under its breath, moving further away from me as if it were going to catch some kind of disease from being in my presence. Kerfuffle on the other paw, saw the logic in my methods and stood by to assist.

    The backdoor opened, revealing not Cedric, but our Qahrburboxis, Tentacles. Huh, the purple squishsquid had finally come in useful. Hearts ran in first while Kerfuffle waited for the signal of approval, looking utterly miserable. I gave it a brief nod and it darted in close behind Hearts. Then I looked over my shoulder to see the current state of Spork. It had moved back over and gave me a slight nudge. No problem there. I didn’t mind going first.

    “Thanks Tenta.” I mewed as I passed by.

    Hearts and Kerfuffle had already crossed paths with Cedric by the time me and Spork got there. Seemed dinner was ready for us now. Spork gave Cedric an awful glare and the slightest of growls as it walked by.

    “That was totally not planned.” He apologized again.

    “You’re lucky we don’t shred your pathetic Human skin-pelt for that.” Spork growled.

    “I said it wasn’t my fault.” Cedric’s brows furrowed.

    Spork didn’t take kindly to the comment still. It swung its head around and lashed its tail in the opposite direction. Its already narrowed eyes narrowed even more as it leaned closer to Cedric.

    “Watch the tone, Earthian, or I will end your pathetic existence.”

    I frowned and moved closer—somewhere between Spork and Cedric. I was smaller than both and neither were looking down at me. Wasn’t really sure what I even planned to do if something went wrong.

    Cedric took a few steps back.

    “I…think I’m going to watch the rain for a little while.”

    I thought that was an excellent idea.

    “Worthless Human.” Spork scoffed with an irritated huff. It carried on in Qwuh—one of the common languages back home.

    Cedric took his glasses off and looked expectantly at me. I simply shrugged my shoulders and grinned. There was no way I was going to translate what Spork had said back to him. Spork’s line of work as an interrogation officer made its descriptions and depictions of the violent things it wanted to do a little, uh, graphic. If I shared that, Cedric, aside from having a heart attack, would potentially be suspicious of our plantology mission again.

    “Nevermind.” He put his glasses back on. “I’ll be outside.”



Rough Draft Chapter 14
That means it was before it went through editing and all that, so some typos here and there are to be expected from the actual book. 

Prologue: Book 2 Cover -Prologue
Previous: KLoC: Chapter Thirteen
Next: KLoC: Chapter Fifteen




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